I met Buddy in 1976 a few days before I married his beautiful sister Gloria. He picked me up at the airport that day and welcomed me as a guest into his home. Over the next several days he helped Gloria and me to get married and treated me like a brother. He was with us during the very small wedding and was the first to congratulate me and officially accept me into the Toner family.
I was just an 18 year old young man at the time and I had never visited the Boston area before. I had an interest in colonial history though, and a desire to ride on a real subway. Buddy thought that was funny and insured that I got my subway ride and he took me to visit the site of "the shot heard 'round the world" at 2 o'clock one morning. He also took me to Faneuil Hall and the Market on my first trip to that site. He was a wonderful host and ambassador and made such a positive experience for me.
During that same visit, Buddy also impressed me with his musical talent. He and his bandmate performed at a small venue and created a memory that I will never forget. I sincerely believe he could have had a career in music but that was not what he wished to pursue at that is certainly fine too. A man should lead his life as he sees fit and Buddy did that. I do regret that not everyone had the opportunity too see him perform, however. I will always envy his talent.
Over the years Gloria and I made our home in Tulsa and raised our family. Boston and Buddy and all of the Toners were always in our thoughts though, and we visited as often as we could. Every time we visited, Buddy welcomed me as if I had never left. He accepted me for myself and treated each of the Kennedy family members we brought along with us at various times, with his good humor and pleasant personality. He made the Oklahoma folks understand why we treasure Boston and the Toner clan so much. My mother loved all of you so much, but Buddy made a huge impression on her with his kindness, quick wit, and laughter. I wish I could have persuaded him to visit my home so I could have a chance to return his hospitality at least for a few days but that never happened and I understand it was not Buddy's way to travel very far from his home turf. Again, that is fine. He lived his life to suit himself and that is what one should do.
I am sorry to ramble but I care very much for Buddy. I have since we first met and I always will. Even though I am here and he was there, it was a comfort to me to know he was there. I will miss that comfort. I care very much for the whole family and I wish I could see you more often. I expect that will occur in the near future.
Finally, I want to express my appreciation to Carol for supporting Buddy so much during his struggle. Your contact with Gloria was very important to us and we appreciate being included when we could not be there personally.
I look forward to seeing each of you soon and I will be touch before then. I am sorry I cannot be there now, but I am glad Gloria is with you for awhile.
Love,
Pat
